She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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