I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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