It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
