So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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