Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize