Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
