SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
