I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
