I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
