Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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