I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I currently don't understand fingers.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize