you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize