My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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