STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
