I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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