im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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