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• (248): View more from Michigan

  i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?

  (760): View more from California

  You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.

  Fav 27 4655 1039

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid

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• (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on

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• (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.

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• (830): View more from Texas

  Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  This is my gift to your gina

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• (805): View more from California

  I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift

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• (707): View more from California

  You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..

  (1-519): View more from Ontario

  Well that would explain the bones in my purse.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  It's official, I'm not staying in tonight

  (1-201): View more from New Jersey

  What caused that decision?

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  You only live once

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