I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I wish you could order shots online.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
