Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
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