Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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