About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
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