can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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