i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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