just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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