what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
