you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
