suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
