I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
