Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Randomize
