i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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