can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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