The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
