are you so shy because you have an std?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
