Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Randomize
