Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
