handjob tips. give me some.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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