I wanna bring you to show and tell
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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