Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
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