ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
he thought i was a dude.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
