They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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