What did we do last night that was yellow?
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize