this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
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I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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