She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
