Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I have grass duct taped all over my body
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Randomize
