Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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