Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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