Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
