Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
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In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
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my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
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