Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
