id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Randomize
