You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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