break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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